When people hear about my past and see what I go through, I'm usually told I'm strong. I've always had a hard time believing this. Today that changed and I now believe it.
My first born son, newly four years old, was having a tantrum. I was annoyed and wanted to just walk away. But I thought to myself I would try to handle the situation differently this time. I hugged him and asked what's wrong. He told me he just wants to be strong. I was a bit thrown off by his response.
In my mind, I questioned what would make him say such a thing? Did he think he was weak? I also wondered if my kid had the same thoughts as I did; but of himself. Knowing these kinds of questions couldn't be answered, I just brushed them off and said to my boy, "But you are strong". He then replied, "No mom, I just want to be strong like you", and started balling on my chest. I couldn't hold back my tears. I felt in that moment, time stood still. My heart melted hearing that from my own baby. All my stress, doubts and worries melted away. I held his cheeks in my hands, wiping away his tears with my thumbs, looked into his teary blue eyes and told him I am only strong because I have him. I told him without he and his sisters, I wouldn't be strong at all. I told him, All together, We are strong. By then, my girls had heard and were standing on each side of us. I hugged them all. Holding them all in my arms, I prayed to Creator or whoever is up there, thanking him for my beautiful babies and my life.
My first born son, newly four years old, was having a tantrum. I was annoyed and wanted to just walk away. But I thought to myself I would try to handle the situation differently this time. I hugged him and asked what's wrong. He told me he just wants to be strong. I was a bit thrown off by his response.
In my mind, I questioned what would make him say such a thing? Did he think he was weak? I also wondered if my kid had the same thoughts as I did; but of himself. Knowing these kinds of questions couldn't be answered, I just brushed them off and said to my boy, "But you are strong". He then replied, "No mom, I just want to be strong like you", and started balling on my chest. I couldn't hold back my tears. I felt in that moment, time stood still. My heart melted hearing that from my own baby. All my stress, doubts and worries melted away. I held his cheeks in my hands, wiping away his tears with my thumbs, looked into his teary blue eyes and told him I am only strong because I have him. I told him without he and his sisters, I wouldn't be strong at all. I told him, All together, We are strong. By then, my girls had heard and were standing on each side of us. I hugged them all. Holding them all in my arms, I prayed to Creator or whoever is up there, thanking him for my beautiful babies and my life.
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